Sure, Dave Bautista — known as Batista when he was a pro wrestler — has hit it big with his role as Drax The Destroyer in Guardians of the Galaxy. But beneath the blue makeup and machismo is an awful sun tattoo that circles his belly button. The Batista tattoo, as we’ve come to call it, is something personal, we’re sure. And we understand that the ink is meant to be personal artistic expression representative of the individual’s ability to pay a person with a steady hand and an ink-filled needle to draw on their body, but a sun around the belly button? Really? Turns out, Batista isn’t the only wrestler with a dumb tattoo. In fact, it’s not the worst tattoo by a longshot. Between WCW and WWF, er, WWE, there are plenty of bad tats to be seen …
#1. CM Punk
The former WWE champ and future UFC brawler has a pretty serious tat sleeve going on. Weirdly, one of them is a Pepsi logo. We’re sure there’s a story behind it but who really cares to hear it? Nothing can make it cool. Nothing.
#2. The Undertaker
It’s gone now, but the Undertaker’s first wife Sarah got prime real estate on his neck. Not anymore. It’s been covered with … some weird shape:
#3. Scott Steiner
Dude was ripped, no doubt about that. But we can’t help but thinking that if he put a few minutes into his tattoo selection into of his latest biceps routine he’d have something better than a cross that faintly resembles a penis. Also, that headgear is awful. Cool shades though.
#4. Rey Mysterio Jr.
Sure, you’re proud of your heritage so Mexican gets on your gut. Fine. But what’s up with those things on his boobs? Birds, right? Gotta be. Is it because he flies around the ring? Or because he’s the size of a bird (he’s only 5′ 6″).
#5. Jeff Hardy
Hardy is super earthy, so yeah, it makes sense that he has a root on his arm. It most likely symbolizes the earth’s matter growing, as he grows, or something. To outsiders, it looks like a long snake-sized turd. Still earthy, we suppose.
#6. Buff Bagwell
His character was a gigalo, we think, and now that he’s no longer a wrestler — on TV, anyway — he’s turned to being a gigalo in real life. According to Bagwell, he’s killing it, too. Apparently he gets $800 for two hours, $1,5550 for four hours, and about $3,000 for overnights, according to TMZ. Yet nobody complains about that dumb band on his arm? That’d be a deal-breaker for us.
#7. Brock Lesnar
He’s big and mean and tough and it’s still not enough for us to see a penis creeping up his chest. He says it’s a knife that reminds him of … oh, who knows what. It’s schlong. Period.
#8. Bam Bam Bigelow
Guy is dead so we’re not trying to kick a mean when he’s down (six feet below the surface), but that flame tattoo is … actually, it takes away from his lack of a neck.